camden , new jersey , police lieutenant benito gonzalez , 46 , pleaded guilty to a lewdness charge after touching himself inappropriately in a starbucks .
gonzalez says he does not remember the incident and claims it was the result of trauma from a near-death experience more than three years ago .
gonzalez , who is suspended without pay , is fighting for his more than $ 60,000 pension , but county officials are pushing for his termination .